After a heavy defeat at the hands of Jansenites only a couple of weeks ago, there was a smell of desire in the air this week.

With a full squad of 16 including several debutants, Tornados were looking to seek their revenge. If Jansenites expecting another easy win, they were in for a shock.

As standard, no one was there on time, including the coach. But we were all there in time for an exhausting warm up except for Paddy, who has 2 kids now and looked like he’d already gone 10 rounds with a gorilla. Those expecting, good luck. But it’s not twins, so you can’t mention it.

With the coach’s plans ringing in their ears, Tornados came out of the blocks all guns blazing and before Jansenites had even touched the ball, Tim had slotted quite an insane finish past the keeper. The writer of this report had his head in his kitbag looking for some sort of sweat soaking implement at the time, so didn’t actually see it, but he is informed it was a sweeping move, back to front, left to right, right to left, and then a head height bullet at Tim who somehow got his stick on it to divert it into the goal.

1-0. How’d you like them apples Jansenites??!!!

It didn’t take Jansenites long to get back into the game however, after some slick work from them, and with their first attack of the game, they snuck the ball past an injured Uncle Tony, to draw level at 1-1.

This was when we first noticed the umpires… we really appreciate their time on a Sunday afternoon, they copped a lot from us all game, but still shook hands with a smile at the end. Fair play gents.

Without going into too much detail, I think it’s fair to say we felt a little aggrieved by some of the calls, but sport is sport.

An unfortunate penalty corner award gave Jansenites their 2nd of the game, with a low flick beating Ollie’s outstretched glove. The writer was tempted to call it a flailing arm, but that’s a but unfair, as he is keeping his powder dry for their 2nd PC goal...

2-1. Not what was needed.

Captain Tim on taking a breather straight after, was still in high spirits, ‘very winnable this, we just need to not be Sh!t’. Pretty accurate if you ask me.

1st quarter done.. lots of jabs, a couple of body blows from each team, but no temple punches yet…

Welcome our first debutant! Fresh off the boat having arrived only a few weeks ago and one training session in, Jonny after a swift break down the left with WWB in support, passed inside, only to get it back, cut across the top of the D and fire low into the bottom right. Yes!! 2-2. Felt deserved! WWB went off for a rest, having run.

We now have a short interlude. – Read in the Old Spice advert voice…

“Have you felt the need to be manly? To show your peers what it is to be a man? Why not use your face to stop a hockey ball? It doesn’t hurt and everyone will respect you forever. And chicks dig scars.”

Kieran is now a real man. We all respect you now and the dimple pattern on your face is pretty awesome, although probably not ideal when discussing ailments with your patients!

Annoyingly, Tornados, having lost the pocket rocket who now was full blind with his glasses smashed into several pieces, did not heed the coach’s words and were continuing to let Jansenites cut inside. Although as Uncle Tony commented post-match. ‘to be fair, if he cut inside or outside, we weren’t getting there..’ which unfortunately led to a further goal against, when they cut down the middle and to be honest, it was a pretty bloody good finish on the reverse into the top left corner…

3-2.

Think that was half time. Very much still in it ‘as long as we are not sh!t’

‘More of the same, control the middle, keep them on the flanks’ was the halftime message.

Wasn’t that hot, so we were all keen to get on with it second half.. no liquid needed. Who needs hydration or trying to cool down.

The second half was basically card city, Adam got 6 reds and 4 greens, somehow avoiding any yellows! Welcome debutant 2, young Will! Filthy tackle, got sat down for 2 mins. Not sure actually what he did… no one was, but it was filthy…

Another bit of cracking interplay between some players, led to a Tornados PC. In fact, I think it was the first one won by Tornados in the match. Young Will drilled it at the keeper and in the aftermath, someone kicked it and the umpires blew a second PC. Up steps Timothy and a rather average down the middle flick stumbled over the line for an equalizer! Definitely deserved.

3-3. It’s a classic

2 more cards for Adam or clint, not sure which, one for Paul for an incredibly cynical hitting the ball away, which he meant, so it’s a card. But if you don’t mean it and its without intent, its ok.. Don’t suggest you ever use this as a legal argument however, has holes. Like the Karaoke ceiling.

Max absolutely loses it.. with intent.

Here comes the flailing..

It was clear that the fresher legs of the combined total age of 42 within the Jansenites team, was starting to tell, they kept coming and annoyingly, a little against the run of play, they won another PC. Similar to Tim’s earlier, was not a great flick, but caught Ollie out with the lack of pace and went past him as he flailed in several directions looking like a man who is allergic to mozzies but being under attack by several squadrons of them.

4-3. balls..

5 mins to go…

And then. It all went calm. This was not the time to panic, we could do this. Deep breaths.. time for the dark arts. Young Will drove forward.. his shins being rapped with every step, but they didn’t mean it… Eventually going to ground with one too many chops at his ankles. A quickly taken free hit got us into the circle and the whistle goes for a PC. We are in boys… come on... A good save by the keeper from a slip left to Tim, rebounded to Paddy, who cool as a cucumber slotted bottom left, also managing to collect one of the defenders knees in the process, which it was claimed was dangerous play. OK, we’ll take dangerous play and have the flick please. No Tim, you are NOT taking it… anyway, the goal stood, so that flick stuff was all irrelevant...

4-4…

Lorenzo got a card for doing the same as them, but with intent, obviously. Adam got another Red to keep him company in the hot seat.

And it was 2 mins to go.

Pressure building and debutant 3 was absolutely making his mark. Nkoni ‘the wall’ making solid tackle after solid tackle with a few cheeky hip swerves in there as well to make space for a defence splitting pass leading to another PC.

Coach was proud. He asked for PC’s second half and he got them by the hatful...
It was clear that we had not done any PC work, do we have any other options apart from straight shot? Nervously the crowd waited, what had been discussed in the huddle? You knew Tim wanted a straight strike, he always does. But wait, slight change in formation, young Will has sidled out to the right. Max inserts. Then he pulls the ball out to the top of the circle (snigger), Tim drags to the right and there is young Will for the deflection.

Oh YES. 5-4.

One attack left, Jansenites flying at us. Backs to the wall lads, another cracking tackle from Nkoni on the edge of the D, but with a combined double block tripod tackle stance with …

Sh!t its raining and my kit is drying outside. Hang on… be back in a tick.

OK, its pretty wet again, but should be ok. Thanks for asking...

Where was I…. PC goal blah blah, Nkoni… blah blah. ok, we've caught up…

A full length 2 flat stick tackle from Nkoni and Paul combined on the edge of our circle is blown for.. well, we don’t know what for, let’s just call it intent…

But Tornados manage to repel and the whistle goes!!! What a win!

The Jansenites coach takes away the sweets that are left after Tornados have had their fill and was not a happy bunny. Nor was their keeper who looked like he was going to cry. It was probably Paddy saying nasty things to him, he tends to do that…

A great result sees Tornados jump up into second place and really looking strong for the rest of the season.

MOM – Young Will – Basically being the best Will on the day

DOD – Kieran – It’s not football mate…